gmail help straight dissing me

when gmail first came out i thought 'yeh, this is certainly cooler than most webmail, but i use pop mail so i don't really need it.' i held on to my gmail account just for funsies. plus, its awesome:

i didn't really use much at first. then i let my mindspring (earthlink) accounts [ &] die. so my gmail account became my primary. this was after google flipped the switch on popping gmail down. so basically nothing changes for me. righteous.

then one day i got my first piece of spam. that's weird. really weird. gmail's spam filtering had been so good that people were actually creating gmail accounts just to use as psuedo spam proxys. then i got 2 or 3 in one day. then i was getting just blasted with the whole gamut of spam: porn, prescription drugs, casinos, mortgage, insurance, softwares name it.

keep in mind this wasn't sneaking stuff. it might as well have had a giant flashing neon sign saying "I'M A PIECE OF SPAM. PLEASE FILTER ME." subjects like this:

  • [No Joke: 3 Laptop Computers to Test & Keep]
  • SEXUALLY-EXPLICIT: held spotted mother democratic enough the rh64kSU5j8Q
  • * Valium bestseller *
  • REDUCE your DEBT by 40 % - 60 %

i decided to poke around on the gmail help for some spam filtering help. the best i found was Avoiding Spam.

How do I get rid of spam?

To remove spam from your inbox, check the box next to the unwanted message, and click Report Spam. If you discover a message is spam once you have opened it, just click 'Report Spam' along the top of the message to send it to the Gmail Team.

Real Fucking Helpfulâ„¢. thanks a lot, gmail team.

ok. so their help documentation isn't great. that's ok. i understand. i'll just write them at their support email which is... let's see its somewhere on here, right? i mean, surely google has a some mechanism to ask for help. c'mon. well, i wasn't able to find one. so i wrote them at the, and this is what transpired.

I wrote them:

Subject: spam filtering not working
Date: April 3, 2006 11:18:47 AM PDT

i don't know where to send this email, because there's no clear support address. so i just tried a few.

but here's the problem. i used to rave about gmail's spam filtering. until recently, it was great. nothing slipped through. then all of the sudden i had 1 or 2 everyday. then a few more and so on. now i consistently get 3 to 10 spam messages a day sllip through. and they aren't clever or sneaky. they're very obvious ones, like:

  • [No Joke: 3 Laptop Computers to Test & Keep]
  • SEXUALLY-EXPLICIT: held spotted mother democratic enough the rh64kSU5j8Q
  • * Valium bestseller *
  • REDUCE your DEBT by 40 % - 60 %
  • and so on.

i certainly don't mean its not working at all or even very great. these just seem so obvious and similar to stuff that does get caught by the filter.

anyhow. that's that.

take care.


They bounced back this:

Delivery to the following recipient failed permanently:

They auto-replied this:

Subject: Re: [#52566500] spam filtering not working
Date: April 3, 2006 11:19:19 AM PDT


Thanks for contacting us. We aren't able to respond directly to inquiries submitted to this email address.

Please visit our Help Center at, or by clicking 'Help' at the top of any Gmail page within your account. Our Help Center provides answers to the most commonly asked questions, and offers information about Gmail and all of its features.

If you are unable to log in to your Gmail account, please follow the steps to reset your password by clicking 'Forgot your password?' on


The Google Team


If you'd like to learn more about how Gmail's features work, check out the Gmail Help Discussion ( where our users share helpful tips and tricks with one another.


short story: that's a bunch of whack bullshit!